Instead of taking a class in German history, I should sign up for something more practical like plumbing repair.
Dig deeper into my family geneology. What happened to that hotel my ancestors owned on Howard Street in 1860?
Cut back to 6 cups of coffee a day.
Meet more young people in their 50’s.
Try not to be too vainglorious when my first grandchild is born this spring.
The Times ran an op-ed entitled “Is It Ok To Kill cyclists?” reporting how rare it is that motorists who injure people on bicycles are prosecuted. I would like to report that a lot of people I know blame the cyclists themselves who fly through intersections, stop signs, often in large herds, for whatever injuries are incurred. At a lecture here recently when the speaker criticized the poor driving habits of local bicylists, the audience cheered. It is a delusion for all these people on two wheels to think they are living in Amsterdam. And what’s wrong with requiring bells on bicycles like we had when we were kids?
I read where the Director of the Alzheimer’s Society has data demonstrating that singing music from our youth, especially show tunes, reduces memory loss. All together now, let’s have another round of “I Could Have Danced All Night”.
Whenever I walk out of a mysteriously overhyped movie (“Llewyn Davis”) or delete the download of a ridiculously praised album (Jay-Z’s “Magna Carta”) or toss a lousy, lavishly applauded book (“The 10th of December”) across the room, I turn for an explanation to the conspiracy theories of my 60’s youth. Somewhere in the upper reaches of Manhattan’s West Side I am convinced there is a cocktail party cabal of critics deciding right now which author, musician, or movie is going to give their stamp of approval for us suckers.
Walking is not exercise. Exercise requires actual effort. Walking is just moving. Hiking is the serious version of walking. Golf barely passes muster as exercise. Tennis and running are over-exercising and too damaging. Same with gym workouts. Yoga is in the identical athletic category as fly-fishing. What’s left? I am a firm advocate of swimming where it is almost impossible to hurt yourself.
The upside of winter is that everything in the garden is either dead or asleep and I get to take out my passive aggressions mercilessly trimming back the shrubbery knowing that the more sadistic I am the lusher they will bloom come spring.
Instead of all those brainiacs down the Peninsula devising a new app for sharing dating tips, why not do something really breakthrough. Like coming up with a way to downsize the price of hearing aids. My inventive brother-law-law proposes that instead of paying $6,000 for these devices we lease them. Any retired CEO’s out there looking for a project?